The Power of Listening

Ralf Nichols says the most basic of all human need is to understand and to ne understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them. Imagine a world where no one can understand each other. What it would look like? Chaotic? No one would be happy because not being understood can be the great reason for an unhappy life. This would show us the importance of listening as well as understanding. Listening is actually a skill we have. We are all passionate about being listened to and respected, so if we want to be listened, we should learn how to listen first.

In order o explain ourselves better; we should always tell our needs with patience and clarity. If our sentences are not clear enough, how can someone understand it and help us? We should always be accurate and certain. A research shows that audiences’ attention will be gone after hearing forty words, so after a few words other person will probably be disconnected. This could be a clue for being more clear about expressing our feelings or needs. In order to be as clear as mentioned, we should always use positive action language. For example if Person A tells me that I don’t understand him, this message could be seen unclear, because “the need is” not specific. If action language is used, the same example would be: “You don’t listen to me and tell me what you understood.”

Imagine a conversation that made you bored, you think that you had enough and you want to change the subject. The best and most polite way to do that is to paraphrase; If you just paraphrase the words the person next to you said, it would show him/her that you got the point and there is no need to talk about it anymore.